Via Instapundit, I see that the fastest "movers and shakers" on Amazon UK's sporting goods site are baseball bats, long bars of metal disguised as keychains, stilettos disguised as fountain pens, and, at number one, some weird tonfun-like folding mace.
Regarding the baseball bats, I thought you people didn't play the game, but if you do, you're doing it wrong.
You're buying aluminum bats. The aluminum models don't pack the mass, and therefore energy, of a baseball bat made of ash wood. Ash is one of the hardest of hard woods. A wooden baseball bat will hit the ball further, and stands up to repeated use at least as well as an aluminum bat, which can warp and become unusable with one hard blow. Only kids play with aluminum bats. Real men, and real women, hit with ash.
Or as one of your countrymen put it, having a good solid piece of wood in your hand is useful.
As long as it's used peacefully, of course.