Following up on his administration's Mars Rover project, Italian aesthete and PM-in-decline Silvio Berlusconi has taken it upon himself to declare lodestones aweigh:
Government officials confirmed today, however, that a valuable statue of the god Mars, on loan to the prime minister's office, had been fitted with an artificial penis. The original was chipped off at some stage in its long life, beginning in AD175.
…along with a new hand for an accompanying statue of the goddess Venus, it had cost the Italian taxpayer €70,000.
That's one way to address Italy's deficit. With astonishing foresight, he provided that each new member be "attached to the original with a magnetic system".
Write your own joke.
For my part, a clerihew will do:
He felt less than martial
Because he was partial.
But then Berluscon',
Restored his omaccion'!