Journal of the Great Shutdown, Day Six

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32 Responses

  1. Kirk Taylor says:

    He's in my basement. Won't tell me the code for his security system so I can get his food and water…and his wife.

  2. Steve Simmons says:

    The JLA is meeting this week.

    What, you didn't know?

  3. picklefactory says:

    Quick, someone Hoon him an Urb.

  4. Partick says:

    I couldn't be happier about this development. Maybe I should revise my opinion of the legislative jackassery that has brought us to this point

  5. JohnC says:

    My guess is we'll learn that what began as an anti-government rant somehow ended with Clark in jail for attempting to murder all the pandas at the zoo for some reason.

  6. Zemalkop says:

    I won't stand for Popehat mandated prayer. I will just have a moment of silence for Clark, and there's nothing you can do about it.

  7. barry says:

    Clark has given up on the leaf spring crossbow and is brewing his own sake now?

  8. Dion starfire says:

    Maybe he had a run in with a raccoon.

  9. pillsy says:

    The picture's from Day of the Dead, right?

  10. Mike says:

    As I shiver in the 70 degree weather in Dallas this afternoon, my one hope is that Clark somehow returns.

  11. AlphaCentauri says:

    "You guys trying to steal my stash of canned tuna and toilet paper? You're gonna have to pry it from my cold, dead hands."

  12. gramps says:

    He won't do a day for attempted pandacide. The cameras are off because of Bush, or is it Reagan, or maybe Haliburton… anyway there will be no video evidence and there is no money to pay real investigators. Perfect storm!

  13. Pedant says:

    Who cares about the pandas and the seals? Think of the ponies!

  14. Wayne Clemons says:

    I saw a squirrel with half a tail running across a telephone wire. Freaked me out. I don't know how much more of this shutdown I can take.

  15. Ryan says:

    In a bout of cosmic irony, a right-leaning anarcho-capitalist has decided that Clark's possessions and wife are a great deal to his liking and, since this person neither acknowledges nor fears the legitimacy of the now-defunct state, Clark is currently being chopped up and canned with a little bit of lemon for winter rations.

    May he rest in peace (or pieces, I suppose).

  16. Sturdley says:

    It looks remarkably like me before my morning coffee.

  17. Kirk Taylor says:

    I have not yet chopped Clark up, and I resent being called a right leaning anarcho-capitalist. I am a center right leaning anarcho-redistributionist with leanings towards distributing towards myself!

  18. Bear says:

    All these folks who waited for the shutdown to stock up on neighbors' goodies (and the occasional neighbor) displayed poor planning. Y'all should have grabbed the neighbors' loot during the last couple of Camping's Raptures like I did. (The Mayan Calendar Apocalypse was a bust, since most folks around here didn't buy into that pagan stuff. Darn it.)

    One of the neighbors does have a pony, but I'm waiting until things get desperate before I stalk, kill, and butcher it. Those things are dangerous.

  19. Dictatortot says:

    Now look here, Bub…

  20. Wayne says:

    I gotta ask, "Who is Clark? Clark Kent?"

    I hope the shutdown does not stop the man of steel.

    Wayne

    luvsiesous.wordpress.com

  21. Dan says:

    RIP Clark, 1902-2013

  22. Myk says:

    @Bear

    One of the neighbors does have a pony, but I'm waiting until things get desperate before I stalk, kill, and butcher it. Those things are dangerous.

    Rather than killing it, try to trap it. A good supply of venom could come in handy for arrow tips and mantraps.

  23. That Anonymous Coward says:

    I has a sad.
    You are all acting like something must have befallen Clark, and I think this is exactly what he wanted.
    He is plotting in a secret lair somewhere, and when your concern reaches a fever pitch… he will strike.

    Cry havoc and let slip the shetland ponies of war!

  24. Dan says:

    Whichever farm animal of war, TAC

  25. Bill says:

    Crap, it looks like we lost Clark and Patrick Non-White. At least Ken's still alive but I heard a posse of Apocalyptic Ponies were seen in the parking lot near his office. Hopefully the cops doing traffic work in his favor in case of an ambush.

  26. That Anonymous Coward says:

    @Dan – No… it will be ponies.

  27. I was Anonymous says:

    The JLA is meeting this week.

    <VOICEOVER type="reverb">
    Meanwhile, at the Legion of Doom…
    </VOICEOVER>

  28. Sinij says:

    My guess is that Clark is busy building communism in his one-person-occupancy bomb shelter.

  29. HamOnRye says:

    Where did you guys get the picture of an IRS auditor? I thought all the federal websites were down?

  30. Aaron says:

    Here's a couple good comments on the shutdown for ya:

    XKCD funny, and SNL spoof of the shutdown. Hilarious! The latter is NSFW.

  31. Ryan says:

    @Aaron

    Thank you for posting that, the XKCD cartoon is priceless.

  32. Aaron says:

    @Ryan

    XKCD is nearly always spot on and quite funny. Especially the hover-over text. Always a hoot!