Hippity Hoppity

Life

So I'm sitting in the overflow chapel for Easter services. Evan and Abby are ungracefully with me, halfheartedly drawing on children's bulletins.

ABBY: Daddy: there's nothing to draw.

[Older couple in front of us smiles at her fondly]

ME: Why don't you draw the Easter Bunny?

ABBY: The Easter Bunny is creepy.

ME: Then why don't you draw the Easter Bunny menacing a village?

ABBY: [With an unsettling degree of enthusiasm]: Yeeaaahhhhhhhh.

[Older couple turns back towards the front, looking alarmed.]

Some minutes later, Abby has produced a drawing of a Godzilla-sized Easter Bunny credibly menacing a rustic village, with some visibly alarmed villagers.

ME: Oh, very nice, sweetie. Look at the villagers fleeing!

[Older couple is now staring ramrod-straight ahead not looking not looking not looking]

ABBY: I know, right?

ME: Look, Evan. Didn't she do a good job on the villagers?

EVAN: [newly turned 12, and suffused with ennui regarding each and every aspect of human existence] Eeeeuuurrrrggggghhhhhhh.

Happy Easter!

Happy Easter

Part of the Conversations With Kids series.

Last 5 posts by Ken White

35 Comments

35 Comments

  1. xbradtc  •  Mar 31, 2013 @12:06 pm

  2. John David Galt  •  Mar 31, 2013 @12:22 pm

    Gee, and I thought we were going to get to see the Horrible Bunny eating the village.

  3. Rob McMillin  •  Mar 31, 2013 @12:29 pm

    This is just awesome.

  4. AlphaCentauri  •  Mar 31, 2013 @1:20 pm

    Yeah, I wanna see Abby's picture! You can't lead us on like that and not deliver.

  5. George William Herbert  •  Mar 31, 2013 @1:24 pm

    There is very little in life as satisfying as realizing that the proper sense of when it's right to do wrong in the world has been successfully transmitted to the next generation. Bravo, sir.

  6. RyanE  •  Mar 31, 2013 @2:18 pm

    My daughter likes to draw things with 5000lb weights falling toward them, and humorous sayings.

    Cute with a little menacing is the best.

    Fun fun

  7. Merissa  •  Mar 31, 2013 @2:32 pm

    Pic, please.

  8. Ken  •  Mar 31, 2013 @2:51 pm

    The drawing, alas, was lost in the post-church shuffle and rush towards the treat table.

    Some church custodian will be traumatized.

  9. azteclady  •  Mar 31, 2013 @2:51 pm

    Awesome is the word–but would be better with photographic evidence.

    Thank you, kind sir.

  10. Hal 10000  •  Mar 31, 2013 @3:44 pm

    My own Abby thinks your Abby's picture would have been better if it the Easter Bunny were joined by a pony, a My Little Pony to be exact, Pinkie Pie to be precise.

  11. Myk  •  Mar 31, 2013 @3:55 pm

    Please adopt me.

  12. azteclady  •  Mar 31, 2013 @4:34 pm

    Crud.

    Timing is everything.

  13. Jim Tyre  •  Mar 31, 2013 @4:50 pm

    The drawing, alas, was lost in the post-church shuffle and rush towards the treat table.

    And the dog ate your homework too.

  14. peej  •  Mar 31, 2013 @4:54 pm

    Menacing a village? Sounds like it's high time she's introduced to everyone's favorite wing-a-ling dragon!

  15. Kat  •  Mar 31, 2013 @4:56 pm

    Ahhh that is the best smile EVAR!

  16. OngChotwI  •  Mar 31, 2013 @4:59 pm

    I was picturing the Undead Rat Easter Bunny pictured at http://www.ihorror.com at 12:51pm yesterday. (which would be Saturday, March 30th). Is this anywhere close to what Abby created?

  17. Aaron  •  Mar 31, 2013 @4:59 pm

    And the dog ate your homework too.

    Funny you should say that, as Ken has a video on youtube of his cat eating his son's homework.

    (courtesy of his reddit AMA)

  18. dogfox78  •  Mar 31, 2013 @5:10 pm

    Kids pic made this old grand-dad laugh and then tear up. I tend more to the latter when I see beautiful things these days.

  19. Tom  •  Mar 31, 2013 @5:59 pm

    Based on the available intelligence on these devious little creatures and the picture above, I think our gracious host should keep an extra keen eye on the smallest one; this smells like a diversionary tactic devised to shroud her Gengis Kahnian endgame.

    Hopefully the onset of teenage angst will prevent the Triumvirate of Terror (it's like the Axis of Evil, but cuter) from working at full capacity in its plans final stages.

  20. En Passant  •  Mar 31, 2013 @6:19 pm

    EVAN: [newly turned 12, and suffused with ennui regarding each and every aspect of human existence] Eeeeuuurrrrggggghhhhhhh.

    It's the normal next developmental stage following the fear and loathing of crickets stage.

  21. AlphaCentauri  •  Mar 31, 2013 @6:20 pm

    Well tell her she's got a fan club that wants to commission a new picture of the menacing Easter bunny, but it's got to include a pony, since it has to fit the theme of Popehat.

  22. Caleb  •  Mar 31, 2013 @6:25 pm

    I'm pretty sure the cuteness emissions from this anecdote exceed the maximum concentration level mandated by the EPA. Additionally, the high levels of adorability run-off present the risk of this entire domain being declared a superfund site under CERCLA. Govern yourself accordingly.

    In all seriousness, it sounds like you have awesome kids.

  23. MattS  •  Mar 31, 2013 @6:33 pm

    Jim Tyre,

    My dog ate my Secure ID key fob so I won't be able to work from home for the next week or so until I get a replacement.

    People who have never owned dogs just don't understand that some dogs will eat just about anything.

  24. MattS  •  Mar 31, 2013 @6:41 pm

    I think she should expand on the concept of her single drawing and do a Godzilla vs Bambi style animation with her giant menacing Easter Bunny.

  25. Edward  •  Mar 31, 2013 @6:42 pm

    I'll throw a plus one on the "show us the picture" bandwagon.

  26. Edward  •  Mar 31, 2013 @6:45 pm

    @matts Secureid has been in an app for nearly 5 years. Get with the program.

    Although I bet my dog would eat a phone, left to its own devices.

  27. MattS  •  Mar 31, 2013 @7:02 pm

    Edward,

    Sorry, my SecureID is for remote access to my employer's corporate network. I can't just go out and get my own token from RSA, it has to be issued to me by corporate security and they only do the key fobs.

  28. Dr.Tom  •  Mar 31, 2013 @7:41 pm

    With all the crazy stuff that has been introduced into evidence (including the rental agreement with doodling on it), I think it would have made a nice addition to all the outlandish stuff that has been introduced into evidence in the Prenda Law case. Too bad it was lost to history…

  29. Nate  •  Mar 31, 2013 @9:56 pm

    Your kids are adorable. I would watch an Easter bunny Godzilla cartoon. Your daughter could be onto something….

  30. manybellsdown  •  Apr 1, 2013 @7:21 am

    @ Matt S. – My dog ate my reading glasses. Not the lenses, just the frames. And he's only a chihuahua.

  31. Trebuchet  •  Apr 1, 2013 @8:08 am

    Hoppy Easter! (Belated, of course.)

    Or, as my Android phone insists on changing it, Choppy Easter!

  32. LT  •  Apr 1, 2013 @8:49 am

    @Hal 10000- Well, Pinkie Pie is the evil one of the bunch….

    Though, mad props to you, Ken, for letting her do stuff like that. I wish my mom had let me draw stuff in church, but she sort of made me stop after I did the naked cherubs peeing on random people's names. (I think I was around six or seven at the time.)

    … then again, I'm an adult now, and I can do whatever the hell I want. I know what I'm doing next time I get forced into church!

  33. dan  •  Apr 1, 2013 @12:37 pm

    The little girl in the front ^ _ ^

  34. markm  •  Apr 3, 2013 @4:18 pm

    Has she been watching "Wallace & Gromit: The Curse of the Were-Rabbit" by any chance?

  35. GDad  •  Apr 5, 2013 @11:13 am

    Sometimes I include drawings of Godzilla in letters to elected officials.