The Sergeant at Arms having called the Committee to order, the first speaker was Chairperson Feinstein.
Senator Feinstein: We continue our hearing on Senate Bill 13-367, the Firearms Safety Act, with today's witness Mr. Wayne Lapierre of the National Rifle Association. Mr. Lapierre, I understand you're here today on behalf of your organization, to testify on ideas for preventing future tragedies such as those which occurred at Newtown and Aurora.
Mr. Lapierre: That is correct, Madame Chair.
Senator Feinstein: Let the witness be sworn.
The witness was duly sworn.
Mr. Lapierre: Madame Chair, may it please the Committee, I would like to begin with a statement. On behalf of the National Rifle Association and its four million members, and the thirteen million active sportsmen and hunters we represent, let me say that we all deplore the breakdown in our nation's morals, and mental health care system, that led to these tragedies…
Mr. Thompson: Objection! Out of order, irrelevant, immaterial, impertinent, and scandalous! Madame Chair, on behalf those alleged to suffer from mental health disorders, I move that the witness's last remark be struck.
Senator Feinstein: Mr. Lapierre, who is this man?
Mr. Thompson: I can answer that! May it please the Committee, and even if it may not, I am Jack Thompson. You probably know that Jack Thompson is one of the most outspoken opponents of sexuality and violence in video games. Along with other notables such as Hillary Clinton and Tipper Gore, Jack Thompson has sent literally hundreds of letters, made dozens of media appearances in such respected venues as Hannity and Colmes and The O'Reilly Factor, and even filed several law suits, all attempting to restrict harmful video games from reaching the hands of youth. In addition, it is my pleasure to serve as General Counsel and Media Relations Advisor for the National Rifle Association, and the witness's counsel before this tribunal.
Mr. Lapierre: That's correct. Mr. Thompson's appointment became effective on December 20, Madame Chair. As I was saying, it has long been apparent to our members that this great nation suffers from a sickness of the soul, and that millions of Americans who suffer from mental disease go untreated…
Mr. Thompson: Objection! Sustained! I will caution this witness not to confuse this honorable committee with LIBEL SLANDERS or he shall receive NOTICE! Our Process Servers will be UNLEASHED! Let the record reflect that!
Mr. Lapierre: … and from the deadly scourge of violent and pornographic videogames, which afflict and trouble the youth who commit these rampages.
Mr. Thompson: Now we're talkin'!
Senator Franken: Madame Chairwoman, may I suggest to the witness that his counsel's antics are highly disruptive of this Committee's work, and ask that…
Mr. Thompson: I don't have to take that from a drug pusher like you, Senator!
Senator Feinstein: <gavels> Order in the hearing room!
Mr. Thompson: You're out of order! You're out of order! The whole Committee is out of order! They're out of order! That man, that sick, crazy, depraved man, raped and beat that woman there, and he'd like to do it again! He told me so! It's just a show! It's a show! It's "Let's Make A Deal"! "Let's Make A Deal"! Hey Frank, you wanna make A Deal? I got an insane Senator who likes to beat the shit out of women! Whaddya wanna give me Frank, three weeks probation? You, son of a bitch, you! You're supposed to stand for something! You're supposed to protect people! But instead you rape and murder them! You killed McCullough! You killed him! Hold it! Hold it! I just completed my opening statement!
Senator Feinstein: <gavels> One more outburst from counsel and the Committee will adjourn for contempt proceedings!
Mr. Thompson: Ah hah! But the strawberries that's where I had them. They LAUGHED AT ME and made jokes, but I proved beyond the shadow of a doubt and with GEOMETRIC LOGIC that a duplicate key to the wardroom icebox DID exist.
Senator Feinstein: The Committee will adjourn. Mister Sergeant!
Mr. Thompson: And I'd have produced that key if the Florida Supreme Court hadn't put me out of action. I know now they were only trying to protect Electronic Arts and Activision!
Whereupon the Committee adjourned.
Last 5 posts by Patrick Non-White
- Coming Soon, To A Theater Near You - June 14th, 2013
- Screwtape Embraces The Internet - June 6th, 2013
- A Word From Our Sponsor - May 8th, 2013
- Lesson Plan And Syllabus For Second Semester Seniors, Princeton High School - May 3rd, 2013
- A Day Reading Popehat Is Like A Day At The Farm. Every Post Is A Banquet! Every Amazon Purchase A Fortune! Every Comment Thread A Parade! I Love Popehat! - May 2nd, 2013

