In Which A Marketeer Throws Her Clients Under The Pony

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30 Responses

  1. This appears to be the closest you've ever gotten to getting someone to write a guest post about ponies. Surely the day is coming.

  2. Ken says:

    Maybe I'm biased. But I like to imagine that after my second email everyone in the audience is yelling at her "DON'T REPLY TO THE EMAIL!" like a midnight crowd at a slasher flick.

  3. Katie's Brother, Flicka says:

    I understand that Katie had offered to write a blog post for you about ponies. I'm afraid that won't be possible, as Katie was mortally wounded in a tragic kiln explosion at pottery class. My dear sister Katie was determined to be brain dead, and I pulled the plug about ten minutes ago.

    Knowing how much you meant to Katie (the last word she uttered was "Popehat"), I'm sure she would feel terrible about disappointing you. I hope you can understand.

  4. John Fast says:

    Hi! My name is JOHN and I am an internet marketing entrepeneur!
    If you hire me, at my reasonable fee of only $USD 500 per day, I and my hand-picked team of internet marketers will use our dozens of hours of experience to carefully NOT submit your firm's name anywhere which is inappropriate. In fact, for a slightly higher fee we will probably not submit your firm's name anywhere at all! Call us now to take advantage of our LOW, LOW RATES!

  5. Tali McPike says:

    @John Fast,
    That was obviously a troll (likely a regular reader with a bit of spare time on their hands) I think Adam is meaning a legitimate marketeer marketing for a company in someway related to horses.

  6. Joe Pullen says:

    Although it may seem that I wouldn't, I understand where you're coming from. I think a post on ponies would suffice.

    Somehow I'm pretty sure "Katie" doesn't understand much of anything. I keep getting this mental picture of one of those vapid high school valley girls from the 90's teenage flicsh whose vocabulary is made up mostly of words like "totally" and "oh my gawd".

  7. Scott Jacobs says:

    I keep getting this mental picture of one of those vapid high school valley girls from the 90's teenage flicsh whose vocabulary is made up mostly of words like "totally" and "oh my gawd".

    flicsh

    And who can't spell "flicks" right…

  8. Joe Pullen says:

    @Scott – smartass

  9. Scott Jacobs says:

    *bows*

    A low blow I know, but I fear that it had to be done my friend… :)

  10. Bear says:

    Tali McPike: "That was obviously a troll (likely a regular reader with a bit of spare time on their hands)"

    I resemble that remark.

    But I think Ken should buy a "personal injury" "post on ponies", and pair it with a "PONY VICTIM COUNSELING" article from Kolabati. Imagine the comment potential.

  11. Laura K says:

    I feel an urge to celebrate the wit, intelligence, subtlety and loveliness of my little sister, who carries a moniker very similar to She Who Has Already Been Named. Glad I helped raise her not to indulge in such ridiculosity.

  12. Turk says:

    I think you should wait 24 hours and then ask when she will be delivering the pony post.

  13. Anony Mouse says:

    This raises an important question:

    If she actually comes through with a post on ponies, will you post it? I can only hope there's some marketer out there who is so dedicated to their client that they'll actually do this.

  14. Deadly Laigrek says:

    @Anony Mouse – A glorious day that would be, indeed. But, alas, my friend, I don't believe that there's an internet marketeer out there who is really that dedicated to their job. That's why they're an internet marketeer.

  15. Sheriff Fatman says:

    @ Joe Pullen

    Somehow I'm pretty sure "Katie" doesn't understand much of anything.

    I got the impression she realised she'd dodged a bullet, and was retreating with something approaching grace and humour.

  16. ZK says:

    So, believe it or not, I personally know a social-media-ish marketer who specializes in the horse industry, and could probably write whatever you'd like about ponies.

    Presumably, you're unlikely to hear from such genuine pony-marketers because this pretty obviously isn't primarily a pony-blog (yet!) and I doubt blog-spam is as common in the specialized industry with few blogs. But such marketers are out there, waiting for the day when the ponies return from their ancient slumber….

  17. S. Weasel says:

    I get those, too. In fact, I got one yesterday. The thing is, my blog is not particularly high traffic and is loosely themed, so what would cause a marketeer to latch onto me, I have no idea.

    Ah, here…it's still in my inbox:

    I represent a client who is interested in purchasing a link advertisement on a new or upcoming post on your website, Sweasel. I feel as though it is relative and a great fit for your site! Please let me know if this is something that may interest you or if you have further questions.

  18. GDad says:

    "…some Katie or Katies…"

    Reminds me of Homer Simpson's "boogeyman or boogeymen" remark.

  19. Matthew Cline says:

    Presumably, you're unlikely to hear from such genuine pony-marketers because this pretty obviously isn't primarily a pony-blog

    That's what Ken wants you to think!!

  20. cb says:

    But I like to imagine that after my second email everyone in the audience is yelling at her "DON'T REPLY TO THE EMAIL!"

    Guessing I'm not the only one who was yelling the exact opposite

  21. Dan says:

    If you don't Name & Shame, are you going to at least going to email those firms with a snarky FYI? If so, be sure to share that correspondence.

    I have a thing for girls named Katie… don't know why. Dated quite a few, and I even married one. Mine, though, is a teacher and not a dripping-in-scum SEO spammer.

  22. Jeremy says:

    If the entire marketing industry collapsed deep in a dark recession, would it make a sound?

  23. apauld says:

    *golf clap*
    *big smile*
    Well done Ken.

  24. AlphaCentauri says:

    Everyone is assuming "her" name is really Katie and not Ashok, Oluwafemi, Vladimir, or Hong-Li.

  25. Treeguy says:

    **patiently awaits the guest pony blog**

    I was going more with the pantomime "look out he's behind you" than don't reply, but to each their own.

    Actually, a series of guest posts from the perspective of My Little Pony characters could open up a whole new audience.

  26. M. says:

    @Jeremy: More importantly, would light be able to escape?

  27. Thad says:

    I got the impression she realised she'd dodged a bullet, and was retreating with something approaching grace and humour.

    Me too. I think I could get on with Katie, as long as she didn't talk about work. The headline might even be Woman doing filthy marketing job turns out to be human after all!

  28. Lucas says:

    I have to admit that I only read the NYT article below because of you.