In looking over the sample ballot for early voting, this got my attention:

Considering the number of North Carolina sheriffs who've been indicted for felonies over the years, I thought it was a prerequisite for the job.

I take it back, the field for best political ad is wide open. Check out this strong entry from a Democrat, Joe Manchin who is running for Senator in West Virginia. I bet every Tea Party candidate is kicking themselves for not thinking of shooting a copy of some bill. That is good stuff.

Manchin is definitely not bucking for Obama's endorsement, that's for sure.

OK, I know this has been a strong season for political ads, and it's gonna take some hard work to beat Ben Quayle, but I think Christine O'Donnell wins.

Sure, this is way late but just in case any of you haven't seen it, here is O'Donnell's new ad. Think about that first line. It's astounding. I have lived 39 years waiting to hear a political candidate tell me they aren't a witch.

I wish I could have seen the meeting where they came up with this ad. This might be the one time getting out in front of a story is a terrible, hilarious idea.

For the record, I believe her. Most witches I know are pretty pro-masturbation.

Longtime readers of this site know that I considered Obama's receipt of the medal an absolute joke. His record over the past year hasn't changed that impression.

But there is a way that Obama could use his moral authority as a Nobel laureate, if not as President, to do some good.

And that is to press China to free this year's winner, dissident Liu Xiaobo, who is serving an 11 year sentence in the laogai for the crime of advocating democracy for China.  This morning the Beijing police evicted Liu's wife, Liu Xia, from her apartment and dragged her off to prison for a "visit" with her husband.

If the West Germans and Richard F'in Nixon had sufficient leverage to  persuade the Soviets to deport Aleksandr Solzhenitsyn rather than re-imprison him, surely Barack Obama, whose moral authority is far greater than Nixon's, could exert some pressure on China for a man who's done far than Obama to deserve this honor.

Hat tip: Instapundit.

Both were lawyers.  It's true.  Fred Phelps was an attorney before he took up the cloth.

Another thing that Pilate and Phelps have in common is that each betrayed Jesus Christ in the name of the law.  Phelps did it today:

Attorney Margie J. Phelps held her fire and brimstone Wednesday until she was safely outside the Supreme Court chambers.

Then she let loose.

"Your destruction is imminent," Phelps told more than 100 journalists assembled on the court steps. "And when it comes, don't stand there and say the servants of God didn't warn you."

Phelps had just finished an hourlong oral argument in the free speech case Snyder v. Westboro Baptist Church. She is the daughter of the church's founder, Fred Phelps, as well as its main legal advocate.

Inside the Supreme Court, stiff questioning from the justices hadn't flustered Phelps. In her first appearance before the high court, Phelps commanded both the facts and the law. More than one close court observer confided that she out-performed her opponent, attorney SeTan E. Summers.

Only once or twice during the oral argument did Phelps hint at the fiery nature of her ideology, as when she told justices that "our answer is that you have got to stop sinning if you want this trauma to stop."

Today Fred Phelps was handed an opportunity granted to few prophets and saints: to stand before Caesar himself, with all the world watching, and proclaim the good news and message of Jesus Christ. Phelps personally could have shouted at the Anti-Christ and proclaimed God's hatred of fags, Jews, and America for thirty minutes.

Instead, Phelps commanded his lawyer-daughter to seek mercy from the very court of Babylon. He professed his faith in the laws, rather than God. Only outside the court, away from people who could punish him for his religion, would he speak his belief that Jesus Christ is a God of hatred. Fred Phelps is a coward, who denied his faith when it counted most.

As a lawyer myself, I understand the instinct to use the law for self-preservation. But I cannot praise it in this case. To argue the law, rather than God's word, before an illegitimate court is not the act of a believer. It is the act of an attorney.

It's no wonder so few lawyers have been canonized. The only prominent saintly lawyer I can think of is Thomas More, who had the courage to maintain his belief before Henry VIII, and today sits at the feet of Christ in heaven.

Some day, Fred and Margie Phelps will have to explain their denial, and when that day comes, they may hear the words that heretofore Christ has reserved for fags, Jews, and sinners:

"Depart, I never knew you."

I like to think that I am, in some way, the intellectual father of this Seventh Circuit opinion dashing Beverly "Bev" Stayart's dream of quick internet millions from suing Yahoo! and Alta Vista over a bad search engine profile.  Or at least the snarky bits: Stayart v Yahoo 7th Circuit Opinion

In any case, I know that the clerk responsible for this opinion has read our work on Beverly "Bev" Stayart, because a Yahoo! (or Google) search for Ms. Stayart still brings us up front and center.

Full background on Beverly "Bev" Stayart, and her knight in shining armour, Frederick J. "Fred" Otto, Expert Intellectual Property Attorney And Computer Engineer, may be read here.  (You have to dig through the comments on the first post for Fred's contribution to the debate.)

Thanks to Lowering the Bar for the tip.

I turned 39 over the weekend. I am still waiting for some epiphany to make me feel like a responsible adult. Given that my birthday party was a minigolf tournament, perhaps that is a long wait.

I think about how I perceived grown ups when I was younger, and I have real trouble thinking of myself in those terms. They seemed in control, mature. I don't feel like I am either.

On the plus side, 16 year old me would be glad to know that I still play video games, read trashy fantasy, play RPGs and still eat junk food but I can't help but think that he would not see me for a real adult. Is it possible to be a slacker but still successful? I think that might be me.

Imagine this political advertisement:

A teacher stands at the front of her class, looking at her students. "Children," she says, "how many of you are ready to step up today and accept Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior?"

Most kids raise their hands. Two don't. The teacher smiles sweetly at the two dissenters, then reaches down and pushes a red button. The two children explode in a hot red mess, drenching their peers with blood and viscera.

Cut to another scene: in an office, a boss stands up and demands to know which office workers support rounding up all Muslims and putting them in camps. Most eagerly raise their hands. The boss stares and those who have not, and pushes the red button. Boom, splat.

A soccer field. A coach approaches his team. "Team," he says. "The time has come to sort things out. Who here believes that marriage can only be between a man and a woman?" Most players raise their hands. A few don't. The coach stabs a button, and the grass turns wet and red.

If you saw an advertisement like that, you'd probably first wonder whether it was actually a satire of religious extremists. If you learned that it was actually produced by the extremists themselves, you'd probably be appalled. There would be an outcry. It would be roundly condemned. If anyone protested "wait, it's just a joke — can't you take a joke?" they'd be widely shunned as apologists.

But what if all the people being blown up weren't people who were religious dissenters, or opponents of intolerance towards Muslims, or supporters of gay marriage? What if the wrong thinking that the people were depicted as having . . . was insufficient support of the dogma of the environmental movement?

It's not a hypothetical question at all, actually.

An anti-global-warming group called 10:10, pledged to reduce carbon emissions by 10%, hired British comedy writer Richard Curtis to produce an awareness video. In the video, authority figures like teachers, bosses, and coaches are depicted asking people under their control to affirm their allegiance to environmentalism, and pushing buttons to explode those who dissent into bloody fountains. As of this writing, 10:10 has withdrawn the video and is desperately trying to take it down wherever it appears; if my link to Reason doesn't work, try Googling 10:10 No Pressure.

10:10 has posted a smarmy "we're sorry a few of you are so humorless" non-apology apology. Too late. Many are expressing revulsion. The video plays almost perfectly into the right-wing vision of environmentalists as humorless, nannying fascists who seek nothing less than control of thoughts and beliefs. It's almost as if 10:10 has a sleeper agent sent by Glenn Beck.

Perhaps the video will succeed in the PETA-style "no such thing as bad publicity" sense — by creating an uproar, it will draw attention to 10:10 and their global warming message. But I can't imagine this video appealing to anyone who doesn't already support 10:10. It's classic opinion porn. It appeals to the fantasy life of the sort of environmentalist who is furious, furious, that there are people who disagree with them. Just ask Green LA Girl:

Not that green LA girl readers aren’t particularly violent or murderous people — but have you ever heard a fervent climate change denier share their non-scientifically-based opinions on TV (or worse, in real life) and thought — “Damn, it would be so much easier to tackle global climate change if these naysayers were blown up like BP’s oil well”?

Actually, GreenLaGirl, though I frequently get mad at people who disagree with me, I don't tend to fantasize about blowing them into bloody chunks. But then, I'm on medication. You might want to look into it.

I'm with Mark Draughn on this one. The people who produced this, and their apologists, are sick, sick fucks. My approach to the global warming issue is limited by the fact that I lack the scientific background to evaluate competing claims and arguments — ultimately I'd be resorting of one sort of appeal to authority or another. But this video makes me much less likely, not more likely, to listen to anyone associated with 10:10. I don't think it fairly represents the vast majority of environmentalists and global warming advocates. It belongs in the category of the freaks who talk about war crimes trials for global warming dissenters. 10:10 deserves all the scorn it will be getting.

I love NPR's Wait Wait Don't Tell Me. I listen every week, and think I know a good deal about the show. Turns out I am a rank amateur. I give you the Wait Wait Don't Tell Me Database.  Wondering which panelist has the most appearances? Who's won the most? If Paula Poundstone wins are as rare as she seems to think they are?

Some fascinating useless data. If you're the betting sort, it seems like Adam Felber is the way to go.

A friend wanted to show me some pictures on her iPhone, and handed it to me so I could look at them. They were innocuous photos of her dogs being cute. After she handed it to me she did a take, and quickly grabbed the phone back saying "let me check the other pictures on there."

Well, that wasn't awkward at all. For the record, no inappropriate photos were viewed.