Things Man Was Not Meant To Know

Apr 14, 2010

By Patrick.

A preposterous notion. And anyway, it's all in the name of science.

Methods: Sixteen anesthetized Dorset sheep (26–78 kg) received 0.0 mg/kg (control animals, n = 4), 0.5 mg/kg (n = 4), 1.0 mg/kg (n = 4), or 1.5 mg/kg (n = 4) of methamphetamine hydrochloride as a slow intravenous (IV) bolus during continuous cardiac monitoring. The animals received the following exposures in sequence from a TASER X26 ECD beginning at 30 minutes after the administration of the drug: 1) 5-second continuous exposure, 2) 15-second intermittent exposure, 3) 30-second intermittent exposure, and 4) 40-second intermittent exposure. Darts were inserted at the sternal notch and the cardiac apex, to a depth of 9 mm. Cardiac motion was determined by thoracotomy (smaller animals, ≤ 32 kg) or echocardiography (larger animals, > 68 kg). Data were analyzed using descriptive statistics and chi-square tests.

Translated to English, that means that scientists dosed a bunch of sheep with methamphetamine, then cut holes in their chests, then fired TASERs at them to learn whether the sheep would suffer heart attacks. The goal was to learn whether firing TASERs at meth-addicted humans constitutes a safety risk.

Duh. For what it's worth, the meth-addled sheep were given anesthetics before TASERs were fired at them. I'll bet the sheep felt great the next morning. For what it's also worth, the study was paid for by TASER, International.

I have little sympathy for the animal rights movement, which fritters its moral capital on frivolity. I have little regard for sheep. But the wanton cruelty and silliness of this study so offends me that I'm going to take a page from the PETA book, naming participating doctors and scientists after the jump.

Dr. Donald Dawes, of Lompoc California, is an emergency room physician. He fires TASERs at meth-addled sheep.

Dr. Jeffrey Ho, of Minneapolis Minnesota, fires TASERS at meth-addled sheep.

Dr. James R. Miner, of the University of Louisville, fires TASERS at meth-addled sheep.

Physiologist Erik Lunden, formerly of the University of Louisville, fires TASERs at meth-addled sheep.

Others are named within the study abstract, but I can't be confident of who they are.

If you would like to discuss the methodology of firing TASERs at meth-addled sheep, you may direct inquiries to Dr. Ho. His email address is jeff.ho@hcmed.org

Via.

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11 Comments

Animals

10 Comments

matt • Apr 14, 2010 @8:26 am

Conflict of Interest: Dr. Dawes and Dr. Ho are external medical consultants to TASER International and stockholders of TASER International. Dr. Ho is also the Medical Director of TASER International, Inc.

got this from the link
Ken • Apr 14, 2010 @9:14 am

Patrick, Patrick, Patrick. This is just typical of the liberal anti-TASER handwringing we see all over the internet. TASER is a high-tech device designed to be a non-lethal method of incapacitating both human and ovine threats to public safety. Do you think you can calm down a meth-addicted sheep just by TALKING, Patrick? Have you ever stared into the wild eyes of a tweaker sheep and wondered whether you'd make it home to see your wife and kids? Would you rather than police officers simply shoot meth addicted sheep, or unruly 10-year-olds, or recalcitrant pregnant women with their sidearms? That would be counterproductive for human and ovine safety, wouldn't it, Patrick? This research helps advance the cause of modern policing. If it turns out that tasing meth-addicted sheep causes an unacceptably high level of fatal heart attacks, like 75% or something, then police will know to use alternative non-lethal methods of assuring compliance, like nightstick strikes to the head, neck, and groin, or running over the sheep in their squad cars. Get a life! Sheep-lover! There's a thin blue line out there, Patrick, between you and wooly, bleating anarchy, and that line needs to be manned by strong men with seminonlethal electrocution devices. Who's going to do it, you?
bw • Apr 14, 2010 @9:49 am

The safety of tasers can't be truly determined without empirical evidence, and many of the same people who harp on animal rights are the ones who cry for an antiseptically safe world. How else would you obtain such empirical evidence? Would you like to volunteer, so a sheep can be spared? The sheep are, in all likelihood, sacrificed after the experiment and never wake up, so their hearts can be more fully examined in a necropsy. So, the sheep goes to sleep, and never wakes up. How is this any less humane than what happens in slaughterhouses all over the world? Do you eat meat? Stop emoting and THINK.
Jeff Hall • Apr 14, 2010 @10:24 am

I understand that the original experimental design called for shooting lawyers, not sheep. But in the pilot study they discovered that they couldn't convince the lab techs to cease fire at the end of each run, so they had to change the protocol to sheep instead.

Goes to show the importance of good experimental design, I suppose.
Patrick • Apr 14, 2010 @10:41 am

The safety of tasers can’t be truly determined without empirical evidence, and many of the same people who harp on animal rights are the ones who cry for an antiseptically safe world.

The TASER has been in use for over a decade without this testing. My objection to the TASER isn't to its safety or lack thereof. My objection is to a law enforcement culture that seems to encourage its use where previously officers talked to people. This testing will not end that practice.
Ancel De Lambert • Apr 14, 2010 @10:57 am

TASERs shouldn't be in use so much that the possibility of killing a meth-head with one is a consideration. They are over-used and should be taken away from police. They ruined it, no tasey for you!
Charles • Apr 14, 2010 @10:57 am

There’s a thin blue line out there, Patrick, between you and wooly, bleating anarchy, and that line needs to be manned by strong men with seminonlethal electrocution devices. Who’s going to do it, you?

You need me on that wa-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-ll.
Chris Berez • Apr 14, 2010 @11:17 am

Conducting experiments on sheep is a terrible idea, as it will only anger them.

Game over, people. We're doomed.
Abdul • Apr 16, 2010 @7:20 am

I once worked on a products liability case as a summer associate and I was poring over an expert witnesses old articles. He did a study where he discovered how much torc could be applied to a monkey's neck while wearing a certain harness. He basically wrung the necks of something liked 400 monkeys over his lifetime just so some company could say the harness would protect the wearer in a 4G fall. His study was irrelevant to the case we were working on, but I always thought that if the jury found out that the plaintiff's main expert was a monkey-strangler, the defendant's would be home free.
Patrick • Apr 16, 2010 @7:39 am

That's a great, great story Abdul.