Thank you for registering on our forum to comment on [alleged instance of politically motivated violence, threats, or vandalism].
Please ensure that your comment incorporates at least three of the following themes:
1. This is a false flag/Reichstag fire operation, committed by [political opponents] to make [my people] look bad. You're so credulous if you think otherwise.
2. This [threat/violence/vandalism] against [political figure] means that [previous entirely unrelated threat/violence/vandalism] must have been committed by the same group for the same reason.
3. From this [act committed by individual or small group] we can see that [entire array of diverse but affiliated political groups] is mindlessly thuggish and that their ideas and policies are wrong.
4. You're complaining about this, but what about the time [completely different instance of violence/threats/vandalism] committed by [other group]? Did you condemn that?
5. You just don't understand satire/don't have a sense of humor. [Note: only experts in political rhetoric should attempt to use this in connection with actual violence.]
6. Oh, people in [threatened/assaulted/vandalized group] are such [pussies/whiners/etc.].
7. By [mentioning threats and violence/asking me to condemn threats and violence], you are only attempting to divert attention from [political issue.]
8. [Violence/threats/vandalism] happen when people are angry at injustice, and therefore this [violence/threats/vandalism] proves that [political stance] is wrong and unjust.
9. Yeah, but [Bill Clinton got a blowjob/George Bush started an illegal war/Obama is a Kenyan/Glenn Beck rubs Vicks-Vapo-Rub in his eyes]!
10. Because you support [issue/politician allegedly associated with alleged source of violence/threats/vandalism], you clearly condone [violence/threats/vandalism.]
11. Yeah, well, our Founding Fathers used violence. We used violence to end World War II. Are you saying you hate America and wanted Germany to win?
12. In complaining about [threats/violence/vandalism], you are attempting to chill free speech you disagree with.
13. WOLVERINES!
14. You know who else [eagerly promoted/complained about for his own advantage] violence and threats? HITLER.
Thank you for your cooperation.
Last 5 posts by Ken
- Citizen Incredulity And Law Enforcement Reality - May 2nd, 2012
- Regarding The Obvious Dangers Of Anal Artillery - May 1st, 2012
- Debate Is Fine. Even Ridicule Is Fine. Threats Are Unacceptable. - April 27th, 2012
- Occasionally My Timing Is Less Than Optimal - April 26th, 2012
- How Not To Draft A Probable Cause Affidavit - April 13th, 2012

