What exactwy does the Mywtle Beach Chambew of Commewce hope to pwove by suing "Elmer Fudd" ovew his awwegedwy wibewous statements against it?

The posts, which appeared on the comment sections of several stories last month, claimed the Horry County Sheriff's Department had conducted raids at the chamber and other businesses. The posts also claimed that computers were seized from those businesses, although a sheriff's department spokesman said no raids occurred and no computers were seized.

"The claims were absolutely false," said Cherie Blackburn, a lawyer representing the chamber of commerce. Blackburn termed the posts "a vicious cyber defamation campaign" in court documents filed Friday in Conway.

That's "absowutewy fawse statements" and  "a vicious cybew defamation campaign" to you Ms. Bwackbuwn.

The waw of defamation, as it appwies to the intewnet, has a wong way to go.  But in genewaw, wibew waw wequiwes that a pwaintiff demonstwate that a fawse accusation was actuawwy bewieved by someone, in owdew to cowwect mowe than nominaw damages, or damages ovew a dowwaw in vawue.

Who in his wight mind would bewieve an accusation fwom Elmer Fudd?  And why didn't Ms. Bwackbuwn advise her cwient to wet it go?

Rather than sitting at work, I am sitting in an over-air-conditioned medical office in Pasadena.

In an hour or so, some medical technicians are going to show me some hi-tech equipment. This equipment, composed of space-age polymers, represents the pinnacle of developments in telemetry, miniaturization, fiber optics, and biomechanical engineering. The doctor is going to explain this technology to me very carefully.

Then he's going to shove it up my ass.

As I wait, Madonna's "Give it to me" is playing over the sound system. This strikes me as singularly inappropriate.

My mood is not improved by not having eaten for 26 hours and refraining from liquids for 14. Not to mention drinking 4 liters of gunk yesterday.

Why am I airing this unfortunate situation? Well, if I have to suffer, why shouldn't you? Also, early detection — through colonoscopy — significantly increases your chance of surviving various nastiness. So maybe if I convince one of our readers to get reamed non-recreationally, I will get some karma out of this.

I hear they give you awesome drugs. I'll let you know. See you on the other side.

No, I'm not going to liveblog it.

Edited:

Done. Feeling a bit woozy. The drugs were a disappointment. Actually had some significant discomfort during the procedure. They must have under-dosed me. Memory of it hazy. But a clean bill, which is the important thing. Still worth it.

For the most part, the games I have talked about have been the longer, meatier games. Sometimes, you are in the mood for something a little shorter. Or, you are looking for a game that plays a few more players. This is often where the class of games we call "fillers" come in.

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Concerning my post of last week regarding plagiarism on legal blogs, the web-monkey has emerged, and it's a threatening little monkey. The web-monkey has a name.  Its name is Wayne Conley.

I'm not the first legal blogger the web-monkey has threatened.  Probably not the second.  Be careful when leaving the jungle, little web-monkey.  It's dangerous out there.

President Obama's speech to the nation's schoolchildren is pissing me off.

It's not just the fact that he's doing it. That's part of it — and I'll get to that in a second. What's really pissing me off is that it's highlighting how hopelessly and insipidly partisan our national discourse is. On the one hand, the loudest voices decrying the speech are offering bizarre hyperbole about how Obama is going to indoctrinate our children in Marxist ideology, and suggesting that only sheep will let their children listen. On the other hand, you've got the smirking, eye-rolling folks who are suggesting that if you don't support the speech you must be stupid or a Glenn-Beck-level frothing nutcase. I've tried discussing this and explaining my viewpoint several places, only to have supporters of the speech furiously attack strawmen they have erected rather than reading what I actually wrote. That irritates me.

But now to the substance. No, I don't think President Obama will indoctrinate or mind-control our children in one speech. I don't think that his speech will be a socialist primer. I don't think it will harm children. I think it will probably be a rather shallow and content-free speech, skillfully delivered, about trying hard and staying in school. It may or may not include some boosting of Obama Administration educational programs; we'll see when the text is released on Monday. In terms of content, though, it is likely to be largely inoffensive.

But I still oppose it.

Here's why.

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One of the most difficult questions that any couple must face is this — if you like the chick flick your wife dragged you to, or the guy flick your husband dragged you to, do you still earn guy flick/chick flick points, redeemable later to force your own choice of movie?

Previously Katrina's firm answer has been yes. She liked Star Trek very much this summer, but remained resolute that it was a guy flick and therefore earned her points she could spend later to drag me to some movie with relationships and no explosions whatsoever.

She may reconsider after tonight, because I liked Julie & Julia very much, and she probably doesn't want me to earn chick flick points for having seen it.

It's unquestionably a chick flick. But it's well written and witty throughout, and the performances are uniformly quite good — particularly Meryl Streep (whose imitation is uncanny) and Stanley Tucci. The plot, while "high concept," is not contrived, and the two story threads are woven skillfully. And the food looks delicious.

Last week I wrote about the Philly NAACP's plans to protest in favor of renowned dog-torturer and sometimes football player Michael Vick. It's inspired a few comments. One of them was by one Candice Darron, who left a comment that I would characterize as odd, calling for a boycott of the Human Society for being racist, but also excoriating Vick.

But that's not the funniest post ever.

The funniest post ever is her follow up.

please notify me of replies. thank you.

There are two possibilities.

One is that Candice, despite the little box at the bottom of the page that says "Notify me of follow-up comments via email," thinks that's how you subscribe to comments. In that case, it's not clear whether she is addressing us, or the internet, or possibly her computer.

The other possibility is that Candice thinks that we're her web secretaries.

Either is delicious.

Candice, kindly take this as your notice.

It isn't particle physics.  It isn't brain surgery.  To be a successful astronautic engineer, physicist, or neurosurgeon, you have to be brilliant and hard-working.  To be a successful blogger requires only work.  In that, blogging is like law.  Perhaps that's why so many lawyers blog.

Now I have no idea why an engineer, a physicist, or a neurosurgeon would blog.  But I do have a clue as to why lawyers do it.  Some, frustrated poets and comedians, do it as a creative outlet.  Some to teach.  Some for the strange sort of virtual society that one can find on the internet (and one can – I've "met" a number of worthwhile people through the web).  Some do it to raise their profiles or to bolster their practices.  Of that last sort, there are three types:  those who put as much effort and thought into it while they're blogging they do while working (these tend to be worth reading); those who don't or can't (theirs tend to vanish after a month or three); and those who view what is, for me, a hobby, as a get-rich-quick scheme, or the web equivalent of a Yellow Pages ad.  They put no work whatsoever into their blogs.  They outsource them, in fact.  The design, the message, and even the content.

Of the "professional" or "practitioner" bloggers, Mark Bennett is one of the best.  His blog, Defending People, is a model of what a legal practitioner's blog should be: it's thoughtful, insightful, and shows its author's dedication to his practice and his clients.  If I needed to refer a client to a criminal lawyer in South Texas, I wouldn't hesitate to call Bennett.  Having tried a few cases myself in other fields, I can tell the real thing even from a distance, especially when the real thing writes about the art of criminal defense litigation as passionately and well as he does.

Evidently others can too.  Then there's Melina Benninghoff, who typifies the third sort of "practitioner" legal blogger.  She doesn't take the time or trouble to write her own blog, but she has good taste. She's letting Mark Bennett write it for her.

Now I don't know Melina Benninghoff from Adam, or at least I didn't until recently.  She claims to be a good criminal defense lawyer in central California.  She may be Clarence Darrow and Gerry Spence and Mephistopheles all rolled into one for all I know, but I'd never refer a client to her now.  Because what I do know, for sure, is that she's a plagiarist.  Perhaps an outsourcing plagiarist, perhaps some web-monkey is doing it for her, but I wouldn't want to rely on that defense in court.  What I do know is that she has a blog.  She claims to be the author of its content.  But she isn't.

A clever lawyer, arguing for Benninghoff in the court of someone's opinion, might say that "scraping" (the term for what Benninghoff has done – lifting content of others whole cloth with or without attribution) is simply an extreme and sloppy form of citing authorities (which all lawyers do), or our old friend, the sincerest form of flattery.  Or, if he's smarter still, he'd just plead ignorance, that Ms. Benninghoff doesn't actually write her blog, that it's a marketing trick, that she'd never condone such a thing as theft, had she but known her web-monkeys were stealing under her name, because she had more important things to do than to actually write her blog.

But I'd not hire a lawyer who allowed web-monkeys to steal content under her name, no matter how well-reputed.  I'd worry about how well she supervised her paralegals and associates, who could also act under her name, while she was off doing more important things than worrying about my case.

Blogs are ephemera.  That's their charm.  If an ephemeral thing is worth creating at all, it's worth creating well.  Or just don't do it.

I prefer Royal Crown Cola, which is getting hard to find even in the south, to Coke or Pepsi, but this graphic chart summarizes what would take an economic historian twenty pages to write, in just a few pixels. Years ago, I'd have to subscribe to fringe magazines or hang out with intimidatingly smart people to get this sort of insight.  Today, it comes to me at my desk, and I don't have to feel inferior to anyone.

Via the best libertarian blog there is.

James Orr put an immediate halt to his criminal trial Wednesday when he squeezed the contents of his colostomy bag onto the table in front of him and ate it.

Nothing I could write would improve on that sentence.

Via Amy Derby, through Twitter.

No, we'll never send you a return link, because that's not how we roll.  Not that you asked for one.  In fact we have no idea who you are.

But we have appreciated the many months of traffic you've sent our way.  We get more traffic from you than from all but three of the blogs that regularly link to us, despite the fact that Popehat is one of the least erotic sites on the web.

You know who you are.  Thanks.

That is one of the classic lines from one of the best computer baseball games ever made "Ernie Harwell's Broadcast Blast Baseball" (it was also known as APBA Baseball for Windows) It was a great game, made all the better for it's full audio. Ernie called every game as if it were a July Sunday day game. My brother and I would sometimes put on a game with two AI players just to listen to the great Harwell call the action.

The game itself was well done, although not as feature rich as todays games like OOTP. You could only play one season, doing drafts was pretty difficult, and the interface wasn't great. Oh, and the voice of a vendor would sometimes inexplicably go on for a 30 second solo. But still it was baseball at a non-video game patient beautiful pace. If you wanted to pinch hit, Ernie would talk about "manager Denney (if you were lucky enough for your name to be one of the few in the database) is looking at his lineup card. Looks like he wants the right hander to come in."

I love OOTP & MLB The Show, they are great baseball games, but they play at a videogame speed. I finish a game in 20 minutes. With APBA, the game played much longer, but you enjoyed it. It captured the feel of listening to a game on the radio. The languid ebb and flow of innings. And, there was enough audio that it didn't feel repetitive.

I guess all of this is my way of acknowledging that Ernie Harwell had a huge impact on my life as a baseball fan, even though I never saw a Tigers game in my life. Thanks Ernie, and good luck with your new adventure. I hope I have as much courage and positivity if faced with a similar situation.

It's Friday, there's almost no one in the office and I feel like tossing some ideas to the wall & seeing what sticks. I have no idea what I am trying to do here, or if these are even fully fleshed out ideas, but I want to put them down on virtual paper to jog my thought process. Your polite indulgence is requested.

My distaste for Libertarianism (in almost any form) is no secret. At best, it's Republicans who want to smoke pot and at worst it's Randian "I've got mine, so screw you." I am definitely a tax & spend Liberal. I believe the country is crying out for a Newer Deal – massive investments in infrastructure, a rebirth of the CCC  and the WPA. I was not a big Obama fan to begin with (and have become more and more disenchanted as things go along) but was mildly excited by his call for more infrastructure investment. Sadly, as is his wont, his efforts have been half-assed at best.

I was part of the first year of Americorps, an attempt to create a domestic Peace Corps. The program had some massive problems back then (not all of which have been addressed, and some of which have been addressed in disapointing ways) but what a charge it was to be a part of almost 2,000 young people working to better the Western Region (even if a select few were there as part of their parole agreements.) That was my first real taste of the power of community service, and it was government subsidized. After that, I had the priviledge of serving in Teach for America, where I taught in urban 9th ward New Orleans. Again, an Americorps program.

Now, many conservatives and libertarians argue programs like these have no place in our government. They are wrong. These programs (and other groups like the California Conservation Corps) represent a Mini Deal, taking young people (many from very poor or dangerous backgrounds) and putting them to work bettering the environment, upgrading America's infrastructure, and teaching those who are left behind.

As part of my time in Americorps, I was lucky enough to spend some time with some original CCC volunteers. I got to hear them tell stories about working in camps during the building of huge projects across the country. They were a part of a movement that transformed America. One of them gave me his old CCC hat, which I still count among my prized possessions. The spirit these men and women had is sorely needed in America today, and is sorely lacking.

There are a myriad of valuable and worthwhile community service opportunities out there (and I can tell you from very personal experience that your hours are almost certainly worth more to most charities than your dollars) that we should all be involved with. As the old Marian Wright Edelman quote goes "Service is the rent we pay for being."

To help pay that rent, and to rebuild our crumbling infrastructure the government should expand their community service programs. Someone in power needs to have the balls to spend the money to invest in our highways, our electrical grid and our cities because it's clear that the free market isn't.

Ask Officer Cody Anderson, of the Bozeman, Montana Police Department.  He was, after all, dumb enough to write on Facebook that he and fellow police officers should be allowed to send "stupid" people to jail.

Anderson’s Facebook postings about jailing “stupid” people and how he enjoys “messing” with the public are cited in a lawsuit filed against him and other officers last week. The suit accuses the officers of illegally entering a man’s home and unjustly arresting him in February.

Although Anderson is being disciplined for his actions, he is not being fired.

Is it stupid for a police officer, in a profession that always faces the possibility of civil rights lawsuits because it empowers its members to use deadly force and otherwise ruin the lives of citizens, to write this sort of thing on the wide open web?  About the public he enjoys "messing with," the same public that might read what he posts?

I'd say so.  But fortunately for Officer Anderson, stupidity isn't a crime.  Perhaps he'll appreciate that, now that he's just another stupid civilian.

So late last night, feeling a fit of digestive upset that could only be cured by a peanut butter and honey sandwich with a tall, icy glass of milk, I fired up World of Warcraft and hit level 80.  I've been playing WoW off and on for years, but this is the first time I'd ever reached the game's maximum level.  And so, now what?

I was initially reluctant to post about this, because it seems such a petty achievement in the grand scheme of things, but then I was a gamer before I was whatever it is that I am now, so why not?  I think it's pretty cool in a very geekish way, and since my wife and I tend to watch television, read, surf the web, and play games in the same room, it hasn't affected my social life.  When we don't go out, we're there together with our dogs, and we're both curmudgeons. Wife, dogs, game: all is well with the world.  I don't need you people.

But on the topic of "now what?", a few members of the Popehat forum and I have begun a casual leveling guild, named Susan Express, for sessions on Monday nights.  We intend to play select characters together, level them together, hit old world dungeons together, and in general use the game as the glorified chat room it's always been.  Characters will be, hopefully, appropriately leveled.  No "twinks," no level 80s running 4 low level characters through high level dungeons.  Though I am pretty generous with my gold.

The guild is based on the Wyrmrest Accord realm, a "role-playing" server chosen because such servers tend to have more adults playing.  We are aligned with the Horde faction, because to be honest the Alliance makes my teeth grind.

If you'd like to join us (I know we have a few current and ex-WoW players reading the site), post a comment here or better still in the devoted thread in our forum, or contact me (character name Tusker), in game.