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Things you don't want to find in a child's bedroom: #91,663

Apr 23, 2008
By .
Life

While I cannot deny that finding some dude (#1) would send me over the edge, hearing a two year old exclaim "Daddy – FLY!" is a bit unsettling. Not at first, as I thought she wanted me to levitate around the room, but I should've known better that something else was going on. Insects don't mean nothing to me and I was actually more concerned that she wasn't afraid at all. Which sounds stupid as she'd have no reason to be afraid, even with the generally accepted DANGER colors of orange-red banding the legs.

While I'm satisfied at the amount of time we spend outside, I'm thinking I need to broaden those insect identification skills. But a general lack of fear (creepy dude hiding in an armoire excluded) is pretty damn impressive. As someone with an irrational phobia, I'm going to do my best to not imprint mine on her .

But if one of those appears in her room, I'll be right here waiting – under my bed.

Last 5 posts by Mike

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3 Comments

  1. David  •  Apr 23, 2008 @6:44 am

    "“Daddy – FLY!”"

    Admit it– your first instinct was to grab your lapels and strike a pose….

  2. Mike  •  Apr 23, 2008 @11:12 am

    If only it were that easy…

    But seriously. Was I too obscure? Should I have titled this, "No way! Why should I change? He's the one who sucks." instead?

  3. Brian  •  Apr 23, 2008 @2:55 pm

    Paper Wasps? Chumps. When you get Digger Wasps in your house, let me know. I have 20 – 30 of them growing in their evil lairs in my lawn right now, ready to emerge and cause me grief. When you have a stinging insect phobia, having stinging insects the size of a humming bird in your front lawn is disconcerting. It doesn't matter that they don't typically sting people – they are horrific. Imagine a Pacific Giant Octopus with a 70-ft. tentacle span.

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